Sunday, April 22, 2012

The Bullshit Goes On Forever

I couldn't resist re-posting verbatim the first item from The Bulletin's "Yesterday" column, a compilation of stories and other material from 100, 50 and 25 years ago that appears every Sunday.

Why should a Bend man smile?

Because: Substantial, permanent brick and stone buildings costing more than $70,000 have been built within the last month, are under construction or will be commenced within a month.
Because: There is more home-building, more attractive residences being erected here, than in any town of Bend’s size in Oregon.
Because: Two first class railroads are operating in Bend, and Bend has the best warehouse and terminal facilities of any town east of the Cascades.
Because: The distributing business of Bend is growing every day, making this the most important railroad point in the interior.
Because: Bend has a brick yard with modern machinery and an inexhaustible supply of splendid clay, which can supply cheaply the best of building materials for a large city.
Because: Bend has a creamery making a permanent market for all farmers of this territory for their milk and cream and giving the most valuable kind of impetus to agricultural development.
Because: Bend has the only ice plant in the interior, ensuring the town the best to be had in this line and meaning that money from other towns will come here for the Bend made product.
Also, there are many, many other reasons why Bend boosters should smile.
These are just a few — if your neighbor looks glum, remind him that the next year will see even more smile-makers than have the past twelve months.
Where now are those "two first-class railroads," that brick yard, that creamery? Gone with the cat-piss-scented high desert breeze, alas.
A century later Bendites brag about our plentiful microbreweries, our many miles of mountain bike trails and the four-year university that we're going to have any decade now instead of our ice plant and our "splendid clay," but the relentless rah-rah tone has never altered. And I'm sure it never will.
The timber may be gone, the ranching may be gone, the real estate boom may be gone, but the supply of bullshit is inexhaustible.


Marshall_Will said...

Finally.., a decent weekend. Notice I didn't say, to die for blah, blah, decent. Recall, there was a time while always the possibility for rain ( and endless jokes about it ) the thought of having passably acceptable weather in April wasn't entirely foreign?

More a matter of having plans dashed when weather turned at the last moment. Not forecast locked in/SOCKED in weeks in advance.

An outdoor April wedding plan iffy regardless your zipcode. For years, ours no moreso than any other.

H. Bruce Miller said...

It was pretty damn close to perfect, Marshall, at least in Bend. Sunny, high in mid- to upper 70s, not too windy -- really couldn't ask for more.

Marshall_Will said...

Other than a min. of 6 months just more like it? Pretty much what the rest of the country gets.

I'm forever having to steel Oregonians against allowing an adulterous mate back in for (1) possibly 'two' days of non-dreadful weather.

Focus on all you have MISSED people! Then calculate how long you'll have to live just to breakeven?