Friday, July 22, 2011

Explaining the Suck: It's The Bitch's Fault ... Maybe

A Facebook friend posted a link to a story on The Oregonian's Web site that tries to explain, in sort of a half-assed way, why we had such a suckeriffic spring and are having a (mostly) sucktastic summer.

Matt Zaffino, chief meteorologist for KGW-TV in Portland, seems to think this year's La Nina* (Spanish for "The Bitch") is responsible both for the mammoth "heat dome" making life miserable in the Midwest and Northeast and the freakishly cool summer temperatures in Oregon and Washington. "When you have such a persistent, stable dome of hot air, it just sits there," he said. "By default we are on the cool, upstream side of that dome."

I'm not sure I can completely buy that explanation. The "heat dome" didn't form until this month, and Oregon's weather has sucked ever since March. In the second place, I've been through a lot of La Nina years here, but none of them was as bad as this one.

Is there any hope for amelioration of the suckiness? Well, the "heat dome" is supposed to diminish and move out to sea, and the thermometer is predicted to climb into the mid- to upper 80s in Oregon this weekend.

But that doesn't necessarily mean anything. The La Nina pattern has broken down, The Oregonian reports, but "its effect on the atmosphere has not."

Then comes the real crusher: "And there are some indications that it may return by fall."

Somebody please shoot me. Just shoot me now.

*I don't know how to create a tilde in this application, so you'll just have to imagine it. Sorry.


How Did I Get Here? said...

Then comes the real crusher: "And there are some indications that it may return by fall."

Don't tease!

It has been wet lately. I think of you every time it rains.

I've had to mow my lawn weekly. Bumper crop in the fruit trees this year...not your normal year, that's for sure.

H. Bruce Miller said...

I have to mow my lawn weekly every year.

Carl said...

If you want a clean shot, stop jumping around!! Otherwise you may get a messy off-center hit and suffer:>).

Anyway, I am abandoning this sucky WX and going to Boise. Summers there, Winters in Las Vegas.Boise summers are more consistent and warm than here.

H. Bruce Miller said...

"Boise summers are more consistent and warm than here."

So I've heard. The downside is that Boise is in Idaho.

Carl said...

No downside to me. I always thought everything east of the crest of Cascades should be part of Idaho, politically and geographically.

Besides after moving my 1000+ lb of ammo and weapons over (movers didn't want to take them, they said, my friends say Boise is more my style. But I may be more like Cleon Little in Blazing Saddles, white sheet and different colored hands sticking out.

Marshall_Will said...

Noteworthy in the KGW link Blackdog so graciously provides, Seattle ( year to date ) has only had 70 minutes, 70 MINUTES of 80 deg. + weather.

Certainly makes a mockery of all those polished turd "High for the Day" claims we've been fed all these years.

I don't know how anyone can make a more effective case than that.

Marshall_Will said...

Newly developed term for long suffering PNW residents:

Summer Intolerant

If we can have lactose intolerant, surely we can be summer intolerant. Just a thought.

Great weekend and all. Hope everyone is finally caught up on their "spring cleaning" now that we've been afforded the weather to go out and DO it in?

Don't forget, it's only a matter of a couple of weeks before we need to get those lawn chairs off the deck and everything put back in storage!

Here in the Portland/Salem area we'll be back down to 74 degrees for the High by the 8th, a week from today. So counting Bruce's declaration, we've generously been given our Sun Allotment of (2) weeks of summer.

Mid/Low 70's in 'August'? This I gotta' see. Strange weather indeed. Watch for leaves to begin turning any DAY now!

Marshall_Will said...

I was going to hold off on this until later but experience shows there's little to fear in terms of unveiling the truth now.

Just as with housing bubble blogging, in those innocent years where either side [superficially] could lay claim to their assertions equally, the battle RAGED!

By the time it became all too apparent there WAS a housing bubble, only those too deeply invested and in deep denial continued to take up arms.

In time, and against insurmountable hard e-v-i-d-e-n-c-e they ALL eventually abandoned ship or simply took up the role of antagonist.

Which is -precisely- where we are in the Great PNW Weather Debate. With new data lapping against their door daily, we're being told even when we're right, we're actually 'wrong' as we failed to precisely determine the -rate- of the irreversibly downward spiral! Thus making fools of ourselves.

Or that "bad news is 'good' news" (somehow?) as we've already SEEN those ridiculous claims. As a settled matter, posts fall off and the blog morphs to the new front, in this case, "What 'actions' are YOU taking to protect yourself from perma-crap weather?" or the lack of posts and waning 'popularity' of the blog serve as all the proof cheerleaders and deniers need to exhibit just how wrong we were all along?

How Did I Get Here? said...

or the lack of posts and waning 'popularity' of the blog serve as all the proof cheerleaders and deniers need to exhibit just how wrong we were all along?

Or people tire of your yammering about how this years freak weather is somehow the norm.

Again you're carrying on as is this winter and spring are normal weather patterns for any part of the country. By your science, Southern California is wet and raining and the mountain average 12 feet of snow every year.

Marshall_Will said...

"how this years freak weather is somehow the norm."

Progress! He's making 'progress'. Not much mind you but... progress.

So it DOES SUCK!? Who knew. Did you bother to READ the links Blackdog provided? This is not about 'me' ( which you constantly seem insistent on making it about? ) nor 'my' science.

Take it up w/ Matt Zaffino. He has all the 'science' you'll never read. I'm anything but an alarmist. Unlike global warming/climate change kool-aid drinkers that 'see' patterns they WANT to see?

As painful, inconvenient, humiliating, frustrating and utterly depressing as it has been, this is anything but 'freak'. It's called the PDO, another acronym you can't be bothered with.

H. Bruce Miller said...

You're both right, gentlemen. This spring and summer have sucked harder than usual, but weather in Oregon -- except for a period of about three months -- sucks every year.

How Did I Get Here? said...


No, I'm the guy who thinks long cold winters are great...remember?

See, this is one of the problems with you Salem guy. Your memory of things we've already covered is very poor.

This is not about 'me' ( which you constantly seem insistent on making it about?)

It's pretty much You, HBM, and I. While Bruce and I agree on a number of things that do suck, I offer my arguments when we disagree.

That pretty much leaves you Salem guy...back to my original question. What does a guy from Salem know about the weather in Bend, Oregon? Not once did I say that Salem weather didn't suck...I believe one time I went as far as to say that Salem just sucks in general. I drove through a couple weeks ago on my way to Pacific City and man, Salem is that town you can't wait to get the other side of.

As painful, inconvenient, humiliating, frustrating and utterly depressing as it has been, this is anything but 'freak

So if this is the norm or even the new norm, why stick around? As I've asked HBM in the past, why don't you move so somewhere warm and dry. And just so you know, that excludes all of WA, OR, WY, MT, ID. You'd think everyone would know that but somehow you ended up in Salem, Oregon expecting something other than grey sky and rain.

You should wag more Salem Guy!

Marshall_Will said...

Unfortunately my friend it is 'you' that fails to retain critical information. I've shared on several ocassions I travel the state frequently, both for business AND the Nat'l Guard thru Bend at least once a month enroute to K' Falls and points beyond. ( And 'what's' this thing we're all communicating on called again? )

We expect "then why stick around?" type comments from 20-something rad snowboarder dudes but must express disappointment when those that are self-employed THEMSELVES fail to acknowledge leaving behind an active business isn't quite as simple as hitting Hwy 97 and sticking your thumb out? We've covered that multiple times since your recent arrival as well.

You've YET to provide a [single] scientific link to back up your 'arguments' and obviously you haven't read any of the ones we've provided.

So... inability to retain info, inability to PROVIDE info and basing claims on emotion/wants over logic is called..? That's right, childish. Step up or step OFF.

In spite of "100 miles and a mountain range between us!" Salem and Bend have been having essentially the same cr@ppy Weather forecasts almost day for day as reported by The National Weather Service. ( So what's the f@cking 'difference'? )

H. Bruce Miller said...

Okay, gentlemen, I'm cutting this thread off before it gets too nasty.