Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Introducing the Daily Suck Index

Today Bend Sux is proud to introduce a new feature: The Daily Suck Index.

The index will rate each day on the basis of its suck factor on a scale of 0 (no suckiness) to 10 (extreme suckiness). Suckiness will be determined by various factors including temperature, precipitation (if any), persistence of precipitation, nature of precipitation (rain? snow? sleet? hail? all four?) and amount of sunshine (if any).

At the end of each month a Monthly Suck Index will be compiled and posted based on the average of the Daily Suck Indexes, and at the end of a year the Grand Annual Suck Index will be announced, based on the average of all the Monthly Suck Indexes.

On days when Blackdog is not present in Bend to observe conditions personally, the Daily Suck Index will be compiled on the basis of official National Weather Service data.

So without further palaver, let's get down to it.

Today's conditions: Temperatures in the 20s to low 30s, heavy overcast with sleet and freezing rain.

Today's Daily Suck Index: 7

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Daily Suck Index is excellent idea.

Today I would not hazard a bike ride. Last year I found at least one good day every week or so for a bike ride, even in depths of winter. This one time, though, on the way back from a class near the Old Mill I hit a blizzard and had to seek refuge at the Westside Tavern until it passed.

H. Bruce Miller said...

"Last year I found at least one good day every week or so for a bike ride"

I think the phrase "or so" is the key to understanding what Jack is really saying here, which is: "I found at least one good day every week, or two, or six."

"on the way back from a class near the Old Mill I hit a blizzard"

I can tell you're from SoCal -- we haven't had a true blizzard here in years.

Slacker said...

Why the hell you want to go for a bike ride in the fucking winter anyways? Winter is the season for staying indoors and persuing other interests. Like reading. And beer.

H. Bruce Miller said...

"Winter is the season for staying indoors and persuing other interests. Like reading. And beer."

With eight months of winter, we must have more than our share of well-read alcoholics.